I sent this e-mail to my mum. It's way to intimate for a blog, but this is what it's like to be a 42 year old woman, starting a new career.
Mom:
Thanks for your concern but I am fine, just stretched a little thin. I have a lot of school work to do and work will be a bitch. Thanksgiving is the busiest night of the year. Plus, my hormones are going crazy--making me stupid. I ovulate on one side for two days, then the other for a few hours. According to the menopause books, my body is flooded with lutenizing hormones (LH), as my ovaries try to put forth a viable egg. None of the eggs are up to snuff, so my body floods more LH in a vain attempt to push out a good egg. All of these hormones make my breasts sore, my emotions raw, and THEY MAKE ME STUPID. I'm forgetting silly things, having brain farts, all in the name of menopause. And let me tell you, it had better be early onset menopause or I'm screwed. It's tough because it's not like I can go to work and say, "Oh, chef, sorry I'm so crazy, but I'm going through menopause," so I have to deal with this on my own. No one who speaks english understands what I'm going through. I'm two times older than most of the people I work with and the other kids at school as well. Some days I'm just tired of being a role model for modern maturity. I know the young women look at me and hope that they can be interesting and ready to start over when they hit their 40s, but I don't want to be a model of cool-crone. I just want to lie on the couch and watch movies, eat ice cream and drink wine. I guess to answer your question, I am fair-to-middling with OK on the horizon.
There it is, the raw truth about growing older.